She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
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