Porn is love you can see.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
