im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
