im holly from the hills drunk
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
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