I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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