FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
