oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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