Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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