handjob tips. give me some.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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