To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
