And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize