In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
