Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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