HIV tests are more positive than that guy
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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