Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
