the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
