Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
