Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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