somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
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