My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
