Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Randomize
