I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Operation Purity has been aborted
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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