yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
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