Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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