Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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