You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
You took a bar mat shot.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Randomize
