Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
