I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
