How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
We left an ass print on the piano.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
She needs sedatives and a leash
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
