I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize