I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Randomize
