my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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