just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize
