But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
