do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
