She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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