This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
