Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
