he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize