Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize