Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
The power of my boobs compel you
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
