is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
