Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize