Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
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