I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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