I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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