Moan for me like Helen Keller
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
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