I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
