dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I smell like Dick and happiness
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
