Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize