SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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