He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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